I decided to click on this blog despite not keeping it updated and I realized I made 2 topics that I actually followed through with, so I thought it was worth blogging about.
Exercise
In my previous post I said I started working out. Well, I kept working out. I still work out and its now a big part of my life! I lost 30lbs between that post and December of last year. I stopped losing weight because I became pregnant (And still am, 33 weeks today!). One thing I promised myself when I became pregnant was that I would not stop working out. Its been so hard sometimes because pregnancy really takes a lot out of you but I do it. Some weeks I only make it one time, but most weeks I go at least 3. I've kept my weight gain under control and I am looking and feeling so much stronger! This pregnancy is a BREEZE compared to my last. I don't swell, I have more energy and I can do a lot more. Very helpful when keeping up with my now 2.5 year old! Overall, I am so crazy proud of myself. I tried running for years for weight loss and while it was helpful I really hated it, like really hated it. I found weight lifting and it sparked passion! Lifting weights makes me feel like a total badass. I don't need classes, other people or gimmicks. All I need are some heavy plates and my own body to make big changes!
Gaming
The other topic I mentioned was gaming. Its also become a big part of my life. Our group has grown and we have game nights 2-3 times a month with 8-10 people typically. I have made some really awesome friends and I am so glad we branched out and started it. D&D is still going too! My lil halfling bard has turned into an interesting gal. From using her own poop as a weapon to ward off unsavory types to learning special abilities from snatching a mysterious magical lute (more like putting it to good use, it was just lying about looking lonely). I am having so much fun learning the game and seeing my abilities unfold!
Family
I don't mention my husband a lot when I post to social media. Truthfully, I think he prefers to stay out of the spotlight since he barely uses it. But I think its worth mentioning that I definitely married the perfect guy for me. Our relationship continues to surprise me because seriously, how is it really this easy!? Things between us are awesome and only getting better.
Our little girl is 2.5 years old now and last time I posted she was just learning to talk. Well, one year later and she never stops. She's full of curiosity, she has an opinion on everything, and she is not afraid to tell you all about it. Every single day with her is more fun than the last. She can be a handful at times, but learning to communicate with her and be a good parent is fun and so rewarding. When we teach and tell her things and you see those things come out in her words or action, its such an awesome feeling. I love being a mom.
In fact, I love it so much we decided to add one more to our little family. Ewan Xavier will be making his appearance soon. I wonder constantly if parenting a boy is going to be that much different than a girl. I mean, parenting should be different because he's going to be a different person with different needs and learning styles. I guess we'll see.
No promises on future posts. but if boredom strikes it could happen. I am toying with the idea of a "mommy blog" though. Since I do a lot of crafts, trips and learning activities with Ev. It might be fun to post what we do. Meh we'll see! Until next time!
All those words I never said
Gently bled, from my mouth.
Sunday, July 24, 2016
Monday, May 25, 2015
No title
As I look over my blog I see that about every 2 months I have a half started post that never came to be. I find myself with a lot of things to talk about and no real order to them. My life over the last year and a half has been pretty much all baby, all the time. I am a stay at home mom now and that has been a really hard change for me. I love it, don't get me wrong. But I also loved having an outside career. I am battling a bit of depression and I think a lot of it is this change in lifestyle. Its a BIG change. Even though it doesn't feel like I haven't been going to work (trust me when I say being a mom is non-stop), I struggle with not having that.
Anyway, so yea there haven't been any posts because I made a huge life change and I am still trying to find my center again.
I think I will just recap my day/week/month when I post unless I have something specific to talk about.
I started working out
I've been running for a few years now, its kept me from really getting out of shape and helped me lose all of my baby weight and then some after I had my daughter. But I really want to focus on strength. The more and more I tote around a 25lb human I realize she's not getting any lighter. So based on the recommendations of /r/xxfitness I started Strong Curves. Its been 2 weeks and so far I really like it. I can do the exercises, I feel really well worked out after them and while I don't really see a strength difference yet, I definitely feel more flexible and agile.
Evelyn
Right now miss Rosie Posie is 17 months old. She's into stacking blocks, doing things on her own and making her first attempts at saying real words. I can say with all honesty that while little babies are crazy cute, having a toddler is like the best thing ever. I don't know why anyone says they miss the early months, I do not. I love seeing my baby turn into a person.
Gaming
Right now I'm fooling around in Borderlands 2 with my friends and I just started playing Tera with my husband. Once a week we host a game night at our house. Its been great for getting to know local people. right now I am really into Splendor and Bohnanza. Our little game group started playing D&D as well, I am starting a character the next time we meet. A Halfling Bard. I have never done this before so I'm super nervous but I think it'll be a lot of fun.
Anyway, so yea there haven't been any posts because I made a huge life change and I am still trying to find my center again.
I think I will just recap my day/week/month when I post unless I have something specific to talk about.
I started working out
I've been running for a few years now, its kept me from really getting out of shape and helped me lose all of my baby weight and then some after I had my daughter. But I really want to focus on strength. The more and more I tote around a 25lb human I realize she's not getting any lighter. So based on the recommendations of /r/xxfitness I started Strong Curves. Its been 2 weeks and so far I really like it. I can do the exercises, I feel really well worked out after them and while I don't really see a strength difference yet, I definitely feel more flexible and agile.
Evelyn
Right now miss Rosie Posie is 17 months old. She's into stacking blocks, doing things on her own and making her first attempts at saying real words. I can say with all honesty that while little babies are crazy cute, having a toddler is like the best thing ever. I don't know why anyone says they miss the early months, I do not. I love seeing my baby turn into a person.
Gaming
Right now I'm fooling around in Borderlands 2 with my friends and I just started playing Tera with my husband. Once a week we host a game night at our house. Its been great for getting to know local people. right now I am really into Splendor and Bohnanza. Our little game group started playing D&D as well, I am starting a character the next time we meet. A Halfling Bard. I have never done this before so I'm super nervous but I think it'll be a lot of fun.
Monday, June 30, 2014
Pregnancy
My pregnancy was extremely normal. All of the things I expected to happen happened, some better than expected and some far worse. I learned a lot about my body in a very short amount of time. I'll just gloss over the highlights. Pregnancy is different for everyone and you can read a lot of books and forums on what to expect.
First trimester
The first trimester was a lot of ups and downs emotionally. My body was preparing hormonally for pregnancy and I've never done well with hormones. Due to this I learned a lot about being patient and also about really trusting my husband to take care of things so that I could get lots (and lots....and lots) of much needed sleep. There's not a lot to say about actually being pregnant in the first trimester because besides going batshit crazy, sleeping a lot and your hips getting bigger not a lot happens. I had some morning sickness (all-day sickness) and mostly craved juice and fruits that were really juicy. Ginger drops were super helpful and so was staying hydrated.
Second Trimester
This is the easy part of being pregnant. You've come to terms with being emotional and with your changing body, all the cool things that happen to your baby happen at this time. She grew little hands and feet and started moving around. Most of the sickness has gone away and (as long as you're careful) you're free to eat whatever you want! My husband loved being pregnant, you didn't have to ask him twice for late night sweets or twice a week pizza LOL. The only "difficult" part of being pregnant was due to a problem I had with a blood clot several years ago I was high risk and had to go to the doctor more often than normal and I had to take twice daily injections in my tummy. The bright side was that my husband was willing to do them for me and could do it (mostly) painlessly.
Third Trimester
Shit gets real here. Your baby is basically grown, just fine tuning and making sure all system are a go as well as getting super big. Like just when you thought you couldn't get bigger, you do. Lucky for me, my third trimester was cut short (37 weeks) and I didn't have to endure it as long as most women do. Every day was a battle to keep my feet from getting so big that they damn near were going to pop. I gained 50lbs during my pregnancy when my "plan" was to only gain 10-12. The most important thing to remember about pregnancy weight is that (as long as you're paying attention) it will all go away when the baby comes.
Preparing for labor
At about 32 weeks my doctor told me that my baby was around 8lbs and if I carried her to 40 weeks she'd be 10-12lbs and that would put me at risk of needing a c-section because of size and recommended we induce if she got much bigger. She actually checked me 3 times for gestational diabetes because of how big she was. The thing is, weighing a baby still inside the womb is literally impossible. They just take measurements and guess based on length and diameter. I had opted for a natural childbirth, which included not inducing labor, so I told her I would be waiting no matter what. The thing about wanting a natural childbirth and going to an OB instead of a midwife is that its an uphill battle to get what you want.
This is where things can get tricky. On one side of the coin, I want a natural birth with no interventions but on the other side, I want to be cared for by trained medical professionals who have been to years and years of college and training as opposed to a midwife whose training was watching (sometimes hundreds) of childbirths. I am not saying midwives aren't useful but with something like this I would rather have real doctors with medical equipment at my side in case things don't go as planned.
So to anyone reading this thinking about going natural but being cared for by a doctor you need to know this: you have to know exactly what you want and exactly what is medically necessary. Otherwise they will do things to you that you had not intended or didn't know about. They will not explain natural childbirth to you, they will explain the easiest way to get your baby out, the easiest way for them, not you. So, armed with the knowledge of what you want for your childbirth, what you aren't willing to budge on and what you will budge on given the proper explanation you are ready to let your doctor know your wishes. BUT letting your doctor know is NOT ENOUGH. You need to tell your partner/coach/doula/whoever will be in the room with you because your doctor may not be the one that delivers you.
With that in mind, here's my very simple birth plan:
No induction unless medically necessary (2 weeks past due date/signs of distress)
No pitocin
No pain meds
No episiotomy
Intermittent monitoring, ability to get up and move about at will
Necessary staff in the room only
Immediate skin-to-skin contact to nurse
I've seen birth plans go on for days, down to the tiniest detail. You don't have to be that detailed, choose the things that matter and everything else will go fine, these people have done this tons of times.
First trimester
The first trimester was a lot of ups and downs emotionally. My body was preparing hormonally for pregnancy and I've never done well with hormones. Due to this I learned a lot about being patient and also about really trusting my husband to take care of things so that I could get lots (and lots....and lots) of much needed sleep. There's not a lot to say about actually being pregnant in the first trimester because besides going batshit crazy, sleeping a lot and your hips getting bigger not a lot happens. I had some morning sickness (all-day sickness) and mostly craved juice and fruits that were really juicy. Ginger drops were super helpful and so was staying hydrated.
Second Trimester
This is the easy part of being pregnant. You've come to terms with being emotional and with your changing body, all the cool things that happen to your baby happen at this time. She grew little hands and feet and started moving around. Most of the sickness has gone away and (as long as you're careful) you're free to eat whatever you want! My husband loved being pregnant, you didn't have to ask him twice for late night sweets or twice a week pizza LOL. The only "difficult" part of being pregnant was due to a problem I had with a blood clot several years ago I was high risk and had to go to the doctor more often than normal and I had to take twice daily injections in my tummy. The bright side was that my husband was willing to do them for me and could do it (mostly) painlessly.
Third Trimester
Shit gets real here. Your baby is basically grown, just fine tuning and making sure all system are a go as well as getting super big. Like just when you thought you couldn't get bigger, you do. Lucky for me, my third trimester was cut short (37 weeks) and I didn't have to endure it as long as most women do. Every day was a battle to keep my feet from getting so big that they damn near were going to pop. I gained 50lbs during my pregnancy when my "plan" was to only gain 10-12. The most important thing to remember about pregnancy weight is that (as long as you're paying attention) it will all go away when the baby comes.
Preparing for labor
At about 32 weeks my doctor told me that my baby was around 8lbs and if I carried her to 40 weeks she'd be 10-12lbs and that would put me at risk of needing a c-section because of size and recommended we induce if she got much bigger. She actually checked me 3 times for gestational diabetes because of how big she was. The thing is, weighing a baby still inside the womb is literally impossible. They just take measurements and guess based on length and diameter. I had opted for a natural childbirth, which included not inducing labor, so I told her I would be waiting no matter what. The thing about wanting a natural childbirth and going to an OB instead of a midwife is that its an uphill battle to get what you want.
This is where things can get tricky. On one side of the coin, I want a natural birth with no interventions but on the other side, I want to be cared for by trained medical professionals who have been to years and years of college and training as opposed to a midwife whose training was watching (sometimes hundreds) of childbirths. I am not saying midwives aren't useful but with something like this I would rather have real doctors with medical equipment at my side in case things don't go as planned.
So to anyone reading this thinking about going natural but being cared for by a doctor you need to know this: you have to know exactly what you want and exactly what is medically necessary. Otherwise they will do things to you that you had not intended or didn't know about. They will not explain natural childbirth to you, they will explain the easiest way to get your baby out, the easiest way for them, not you. So, armed with the knowledge of what you want for your childbirth, what you aren't willing to budge on and what you will budge on given the proper explanation you are ready to let your doctor know your wishes. BUT letting your doctor know is NOT ENOUGH. You need to tell your partner/coach/doula/whoever will be in the room with you because your doctor may not be the one that delivers you.
With that in mind, here's my very simple birth plan:
No induction unless medically necessary (2 weeks past due date/signs of distress)
No pitocin
No pain meds
No episiotomy
Intermittent monitoring, ability to get up and move about at will
Necessary staff in the room only
Immediate skin-to-skin contact to nurse
I've seen birth plans go on for days, down to the tiniest detail. You don't have to be that detailed, choose the things that matter and everything else will go fine, these people have done this tons of times.
First post as someones mom.
I can't believe I have a 6 month old baby! It has definitely been an interesting ride. This time last year I was just finding out I was pregnant. It feels like it was eons ago. I have a lot to say on the subject but honestly, being a first time mom I felt a little intimidated about blogging about my pregnancy and definitely about being a parent. Mostly because I have no idea what I'm doing. I've since come to the terms with the fact that I do not have to be the absolute authority on it to at least share my point of view. For those of you that know me, I can be a bit of a control freak and I absolutely have to know everything about everything. So parenting has been a real challenge for me, I want to make sure I am one step ahead of whats happening so I am prepared and giving my daughter the best of the best care. Its just not possible. You can read and talk and prepare but every baby is different and most of what you find are just loose guidelines on what you can expect to see AND parents are incredibly opinionated people. Like, baring teeth and claws opinionated. Its scary.
So. I'm going to make separate entries to catch myself up to this point. My blog has always been a mix of stuff that interests me and it still will be but I'll be honest, I am a stay at home mom to a very young child so my life right now doesn't consist of much more than baby stuff, so that's what you're going to be reading about a lot.
So. I'm going to make separate entries to catch myself up to this point. My blog has always been a mix of stuff that interests me and it still will be but I'll be honest, I am a stay at home mom to a very young child so my life right now doesn't consist of much more than baby stuff, so that's what you're going to be reading about a lot.
Tuesday, August 27, 2013
Start trying now they said, it'll take nearly a year they said...
One of the first conversation Nick and I had when we met, like literally the first night because I was just coming out of a relationship with someone who didn't want a family, was how important starting a family was. We both agreed that we wanted kids and couldn't wait to be in a position to get started. Obviously after getting married, buying a home and having good careers the conversation about kids came back up. Spending time with my sister Lindsy's amazing kid Jax kinda sealed the deal for us, we can do this! So we decided 2014 was the year to start. We'd have time to pay off some house debt and plan for everything. Well as most people know it takes about 40 weeks to grow a baby so we thought maybe start trying around the holidays. After telling some friends and family about our plans we were promptly told that it could take months, even years to conceive. Being that I am 32 years old and throughout my life have never had anything near a close call this advice started to get in my head...oh god..what if I haven't accidentally gotten pregnant because I actually can't get pregnant?! Nick assured me that he had super sperm and no matter what a baby would happen, lol. At any rate, the night of our wedding we decided to forgo the birth control and just let things happen naturally. 4 weeks later I was 4 weeks pregnant!
I knew I was pregnant right away, but I needed to wait for that magic missed period to be totally sure. So the day it didn't happen I ran out to the drugstore and got a test. I was on my way home from work, I didn't want to false alarm Nick so I went straight to the bathroom when I got home figuring if it was negative, no big deal, I wouldn't say anything and just move on with life (but who are we kidding I've never kept anything from Nick because I can't seem to). I brought a book thinking it would be awhile before the results were clear. No sooner did I put the cap on the stick did those two blue lines show up and tell me what I thought wasn't possible! I went straight to Nick and told him I had to tell him something. I handed him the stick and he looked at me in disbelief. His range of emotions in the next 3 minutes was probably the fastest I've ever seen anyone go. He hugged me and said he was excited, went into his "I told you so's" about his super sperm and then started freaking out about money. First we had to sell the house, then he'd have to get a promotion at work, maybe go down to one car. After I reminded him that the reason we bought a home was because this is what we wanted and that everything was going to be ok he calmed down and immediately hopped in the car so we could drive to his best friends house and tell him the news!
So here we are. I am 21 1/2 weeks pregnant with our baby girl Evelyn Rose. We had originally only chosen a boy name (actually we picked it like over a year ago) because we both really wanted a little boy to camp, hike and climb with. I was worried when we found out it was a girl that Nick would be disappointed but on the contrary, he can't wait to have a little girl to take care of. Only the best for his lil Ev, she's already got him wrapped around her little finger. Its really fun to work on the little changes in our lives that having a baby is doing. Even more so that my husband is 100% all hands on deck into everything!
Here's the facebook announcement we made. It was supposed to be a shot of our shoes, the dogs feet and Ev's shoes but the look of total disappointment on the dogs faces was too priceless to not include!
I knew I was pregnant right away, but I needed to wait for that magic missed period to be totally sure. So the day it didn't happen I ran out to the drugstore and got a test. I was on my way home from work, I didn't want to false alarm Nick so I went straight to the bathroom when I got home figuring if it was negative, no big deal, I wouldn't say anything and just move on with life (but who are we kidding I've never kept anything from Nick because I can't seem to). I brought a book thinking it would be awhile before the results were clear. No sooner did I put the cap on the stick did those two blue lines show up and tell me what I thought wasn't possible! I went straight to Nick and told him I had to tell him something. I handed him the stick and he looked at me in disbelief. His range of emotions in the next 3 minutes was probably the fastest I've ever seen anyone go. He hugged me and said he was excited, went into his "I told you so's" about his super sperm and then started freaking out about money. First we had to sell the house, then he'd have to get a promotion at work, maybe go down to one car. After I reminded him that the reason we bought a home was because this is what we wanted and that everything was going to be ok he calmed down and immediately hopped in the car so we could drive to his best friends house and tell him the news!
So here we are. I am 21 1/2 weeks pregnant with our baby girl Evelyn Rose. We had originally only chosen a boy name (actually we picked it like over a year ago) because we both really wanted a little boy to camp, hike and climb with. I was worried when we found out it was a girl that Nick would be disappointed but on the contrary, he can't wait to have a little girl to take care of. Only the best for his lil Ev, she's already got him wrapped around her little finger. Its really fun to work on the little changes in our lives that having a baby is doing. Even more so that my husband is 100% all hands on deck into everything!
Here's the facebook announcement we made. It was supposed to be a shot of our shoes, the dogs feet and Ev's shoes but the look of total disappointment on the dogs faces was too priceless to not include!
Tuesday, June 25, 2013
WE GOT MARRIED!!!
In light of my back issues Nick and I decided to get married early and add me to his much better health insurance plan. That and we just couldn't freaking wait to get married. Wedding planning is daunting. I tried on dresses and went to expos and honestly all this wedding crap was just that...crap! Its never been my dream to get all fluffed up in a white dress and having all my friends and family staring at me and then drink all night long (not to mention spending literally all of our money to have this event!). When I realized we could just marry each other the way we want to, when we want to and have a celebration of the event with friends/family later. Once that hit me, I relaxed and started planning it the right way.
So we were going to get married at the courthouse on our 2 year anniversary. It was good timing because I like our anniversary date and my sister was going to be in town visiting. We were telling Nicks friend Jon about the plans and Jon says he's actually ordained (online) and can marry us for free! YAY! This suddenly opened up so many possibilities. So we decided to make our wedding a little more meaningful.
Nick actually formally asked me to be his girlfriend when we were first dating. I thought it was adorable, I'd never actually been asked like that before. We had hiked up a mountain that day and were enjoying the sunset and he told me he wanted me to be only his. Since our wedding options had opened up recently, we decided what better place to get married than the spot it all began on the 2 year anniversary of the day it happened? Nothing could have possibly been better.
We hiked up North Mountain in Phoenix with my sister and nephew, best friend, Nicks 2 best friends and our officiant. It was so windy up there! When we got to the spot, we held hands and Jon read some beautiful passages, we said our I do's and it was done. Beautifully done. After hugging and taking photos, we all hiked back down and celebrated with sushi dinner.
The photos can be found here
Wednesday, April 24, 2013
My Back.
For the last few years I have had some issues with chronic back pain, numbness and tingling in my back and arms. I never went to the doctor (because that's just what I do..or don't do) just assuming it was a mixture of being a bit overweight, sitting at a desk job, having scoliosis and having large breasts. I got really sick with the flu a couple of months ago so while I was at the doctor having that looked at I mentioned my back issues. She decided to schedule me for an x-ray to see what was going on. The Xray showed my scoliosis and possibly some issues with my disks so I went for an MRI. The MRI was only on my neck and just below but what they found was something called a Syrinx Cavity causing a condition called Syringomyelia. So far, the disks in my C-spine are completely desiccated (gone) because of it. My doctor had never heard of it before and did a terrible job of explaining the condition to me, she literally printed out some medical dictionary stuff and told me to go see a neuro-surgeon.
I'll be completely honest. I'm terrified. I don't even want to go see this doctor because of a million what-ifs. I'm somewhat relieved that I know there's something actually wrong and I'm not just in pain because of my weight or posture. But I don't want to go to this doctor.
Nick has been the epitome of support. I can't truly express how much I love him and all that he does to take care of me. He started calling the doctors for me when he realized I was putting it off, making my appointments and faxing in all the diagnoses, he even contacted the Mayo clinic just in case I do need surgery. He got me a massage and offers to schedule me one whenever I want.
So yesterday, finally, all the paperwork was sent in to the neurosurgeons office. They are looking over all the tests now and will call me for an appointment. I really like how the office does things, they read what I've had done already, then decide where to go before ever meeting me. So they don't walk into the appointment blind. I'm anxious but I know no matter what happens I'll be ok :)
I'll be completely honest. I'm terrified. I don't even want to go see this doctor because of a million what-ifs. I'm somewhat relieved that I know there's something actually wrong and I'm not just in pain because of my weight or posture. But I don't want to go to this doctor.
Nick has been the epitome of support. I can't truly express how much I love him and all that he does to take care of me. He started calling the doctors for me when he realized I was putting it off, making my appointments and faxing in all the diagnoses, he even contacted the Mayo clinic just in case I do need surgery. He got me a massage and offers to schedule me one whenever I want.
So yesterday, finally, all the paperwork was sent in to the neurosurgeons office. They are looking over all the tests now and will call me for an appointment. I really like how the office does things, they read what I've had done already, then decide where to go before ever meeting me. So they don't walk into the appointment blind. I'm anxious but I know no matter what happens I'll be ok :)
Saturday, March 09, 2013
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